Something Bloggy This Way Comes?

22 May 2013 8 Comments

by ankoku1331 in Deep Thought, Sex Thought Tags: , , ,

This may be one of my all over the place posts.

Mrs. Fever and I have been batting around the idea of doing something bloggy. Like a party or costume party or some other form of multiday fun bloggy activity that involves as many bloggers as want to take part over the summer.  Did that make sense?  Probably not.  We are looking to do something fun over the summer that involves as many bloggers that want to take part.  What is this fun thing…well (sheepish look) we haven’t figured that part out yet.  Suggestions are more than welcome as are people who want to take part in whatever bloggy thing we come up with.

I think that made more sense.

I will read it tomorrow to make sure.

Yes, I will be posting this now, but reading it tomorrow.

Next, I have narrowed the rules to my blog award down to three or four steps and only a couple of things for you to do.  Something that I have noticed is that awardies (is that a word?  the red line is saying no) always end up at the bottom of the post.  As part of my award the awardies will go right after the thank you.  I still haven’t settled up an image or a title yet.

The rules

  1. Thank and link back to the blogger that awarded you the (insert name).  Copy the award into your post.
  2. Pass the award onto a minimum of 1 blogger to a maximum of 3 bloggers.
  3. Craft a single paragraph of erotica-ish material with the prompts given by the awarder.
  4. Pass along three to five prompts for the bloggers you awarded to create their own single paragraph of erotica-ish material.

That’s it.  Nothing to difficult.  Interactive. Creative.  Modifiable.  Hopefully once I find an image and a name this takes off.  As always there is still time for you to give your feed back on the rules.  I’m easy like that.

Lastly for this mess of a post…stupid organization. :)

Fun with Mirrors 1Coming up will be a Kinky Fuckery post about fun with mirrors.  More fun than that is if I can find the people I want to work, no scratch that, create-craft-produce…yes produce a Bondage for Beginners video.

Wait, did I say lastly up there?  Oops.

I want to take a moment and say THANK YOU to all of my regular readers and followers.  Your comments of support and understand during my recent rant-breakdown-mind vomit-hate and bile filled moment of self-reflection really made me feel better.  I haven’t said THANK YOU in a while.

THANK YOU

This is why I blog now, because of the people I have met, gotten to know, and who when the chips are wherever they are, are there with a kind word or a “you are not alone comment.”

I can’t wait to read this tomorrow. ;)

Bondage For Beginners: Control Checklist

21 May 2013 13 Comments

by ankoku1331 in Bondage For Beginners Tags: , , , ,

PeekabooTime for some fun.

Lets run over a check list first:

You have established a safe word.  You have haven’t you?  If not, get to it?  Make sure that if the person you are typing up can’t speak that there is a visible and easy to recognize hand symbol or other gesture for then to use as their safe word.

You have talked with, not to, the person to be bound enough to know some basic information about them, such as what they think they want to do or have done or to happen.  You have discussed activities that are off-limits?  You better have  and I cannot stress this enough, DO NOT even attempt to do something that is off-limits if you want to have more bondage fun with that person again.

You have gathered your equipment.  Mostly objects that are lying around the place.  I do not recommend spending lots of money until you know if this is something that you want to do for a while.  Bondage equipment, even cuffs, are an investment.  You have a place and time.

So now what?

I recommend starting with the familiar, tying him or her down on their backs with their arms and legs out of the way.  The classic face-up spread eagle position allows you the most access, in the easiest fashion, while providing some level of familiarity to the person bound.  Avoid tying face down until you and the person you are tying down are more comfortable with bondage. In the words of Mrs. Fever, “Takes away the ‘I’m smothering’ factor.” A pillow placed under the lower back will make access to genitals easier and comfortable for the person bound.  Another recommendation from Mrs. Fever are small pillows under knees.  Double check that the person bound is comfortable.

With them on their back and limbs out of the way you can position yourself on either side, between their legs, or straddle them with ease.  Start with touching, as I talked about in Bondage For Beginners: Pleasure Principal.  Watch how their body reacts to your touch and try out different types of touches, light and feathery alternated with firm or the tips of your nails.  Move all over their body, but make sure to hit those erogenous zones.  Tactile sensation is great, but this is about sex afterall, so make sure to run your fingers around breasts, cock, pussy.  At this stage, foreplay for those not in the know, the goal is to build up anticipation, excitement, and arousal.

Progress to kisses, licks, nibbles, and touching.  Hopefully you know what makes them tick.  Watch their reactions-how their body moves, their breathing, skin flushing, and everything else.  These are excellent indicators to how you fast you should proceed.  Is he or she trying to move their hips to put your hand or lips in contact with their cock or pussy?  Is their chest or genitals flush in color or engorged?  Has their breathing gotten heavier? Are they closing their eyes in pleasure and/or making pleasurable sounds?  Take these as signs, but until you are ready to proceed to the next step don’t give the bound person everything.

Keep that in mind, you are in control of their pleasure.  They can want, they can beg, they can try to move, but in the end you decide when things progress.  Knowing how the person reacts is the key to a great bondage experience for you and them.

Next time toys and more on control.

Until then see these for more information:

Bondage for Beginners

Bondage for Beginning Beginners

Bondage for Beginning Beginners II

Bondage for Beginners Cuff Special

Bondage for Beginners: Cuff Special Now with Photos

Bondage for Amateur Novices (Part 1)

Bondage for Amateur Novices (Part 2)

Bondage for Amateur Novices (Part 3)

Bondage for…Well I’m Not Sure Yet

Bondage for Beginners, What To Do Overview

Bondage for Beginners: Pleasure Principle

Mr. Grumpy Pants

20 May 2013 20 Comments

by ankoku1331 in BALLS!!! Tags: , , , , , , ,

I am angry.

I am full of rage.

I am full of hatred.

I am frustrated.

I am irritated.

Everything around me is working my last nerve.

I don’t feel like doing anything and at the same time I want to go do something.

New people move in behind us and the only thought going through my head is, “How long until they do something to piss me off.”

I don’t know these people.

They have done nothing more than move in behind us.

Yet, at this moment, I want them gone.

I hate being here.

I love the area, but hate the college.

The area is full of life, vibrant, full of color, and makes the inner me happy.

The college is a blight upon the land and a disgrace to the word education.

I don’t want to be filled with anger.

In the past I had things to do to burn off my rage, outlets for my unused energy.

I no longer fight.

I no longer teach self-offense.

I no longer have stupid video games like DOOM.

I do not have any friends nearby to do anything with.

I would paint, but I am out of miniatures.

I would write, but even that irritates me.

This blog irritates me.

Unfocused, mercurial, with extreme edges like it’s owner.

My stats irritate me.

My stats don’t bother me.

Like everything else over the past week I cannot explain what is on my mind other than in terms of contradicting extremes.

I would fuck my rage away, but Barb caught a cold, she says that she didn’t do it on purpose.

I believe her.

I hate her cold. :)

The heat bothers me where did Spring go?

The storms sooth the inner me.

I want more storms.

Until I get sinusey, then I want the storms gone.

I am old.

I don’t feel old.

I am overweight.

I want the weight gone.

Losing the weight irritates me.

I irritate me.

Everything irritates me at the moment.

I want to sleep.

I don’t like sleep.

I lash out and rage for no real reason.

I have no reason to be angry.

Not the neighbors.

Not the school.

Not Barb’s cold.

Not the weather.

Not the television.

Not the lack of games.

Not the lack of friends.

Not the lack of a life here in the middle of nowhere.

Not anything.

I am angry.

My anger is a problem.

Self-reflection is good.

Self-reflection is something I do.

I do not like mirrors.

Self-reflection tells me that I am angry at nothing.

Self-reflection tells me that I am fearful of something.

What?

Failure?

Entirely possible, I do have a past of blowing things right before the end.

I am a good starter.

I am an okay finisher.  This is better than when I was a lousy finisher.

I am nearing the finish of several things at one time.

I am nearing the end of On Volunteering.

I am nearing the end of school.

I am nearing the end of our time here.

I am nearing the end of my girl being underfoot 24/7-she goes off to school soon.

I am nearing the end of a summer research project even though it hasn’t begun yet the end is visible.

I am nearing the end of time to prep to teach a class about blogging.

The hits to my blog have left me with doubt that I should be the one teaching anyone about blogging.

Shouldn’t a teacher be successful?

I am not successful as a blogger, in the same way that I am not successful as a writer.

People other than me like to measure success.

Measurements require tangibility.

I have not been published more than once-stupid Fantages going under or disappearing or whatever happened to that jackass.

I have self-published a lot, but isn’t that like masturbation-done on my own for my own pleasure.

At times I am inclined to think so.

Blog success is measured by views, followers, and other tangible stats.  I no longer have those.

I know better.

I know that success is not what everyone says success is, but I am tired of answering the questions.

Have you been published?

How many views do you have?

I am tired.

I am angry.

I am frustrated.

I am Mr. Grumpy Pants.

Building A Better Blogger: Add New Post Features

20 May 2013 2 Comments

by ankoku1331 in Building A Better Blogger Tags: , , , ,

I am not sure how much of this will be of use to regular bloggers, but for people in my class who have not blogged or used WordPress this might be of some use.  I am going to show what each of the various functions look like, so this post will most likely end up looking like a mess.  Sorry. ;)

I will start off with font stuff first.

Bold (click B box top row)

Italic (click I box top row)

Underline (click U bottom row)

Strikethrough (ABC next to I top row)

Bold Italic Underline and Strikethrough (these functions can be combined together in a variety of ways)

  • Bullet Point (press box with 3 dots and dashes)

Header 1

Header 2

Header 3

Heading 4

Heading 5
Heading 6 (all found via dropdown menu labeled paragraph)
  1. Numbered List (press box with 1,2,3 and dashes)

Do you have a spam problem on this blog; I also am a blogger, and I was wanting to know your situation; many of us have developed some nice methods and we are looking to trade techniques with other folks, please shoot me an email if interested. (press ” symbol to block quote something-you will have to add your own quotation marks)

Align stuff to the center (press button with lines in the center)

Align Right (press button with lines to the right)

Align Left (default position)

Color Text (press A button with dropdown menu for colors-can be combined with any of the above)

Paste as Text (clipboard with T) and Paste as Word (clipboard with W) allow you to keep formatting from text or Word-does not always work.

Eraser-removes formatting

©ß♥√ and many other custom symbols are found when you click the Ω Omega button

Indent with the indent button (lines with arrow pointing right, bottom row)

Outdent with the outdent buttom (lines with arrow pointing left, bottom row)

Curvy arrow is the UNDO button.

Insert more tag button when you see this button, like here for example, click to expand post. More

Feeling About This _ Inspired

19 May 2013 15 Comments

by ankoku1331 in BALLS!!! Tags: , , , , ,

Shot to the HeadBleh!

I spent a good chunk of the morning working on the blog.  The old stuff category is gone.  I missed seeing all of the stories and erotica that I wrote in a visible way.  Plus going through that stuff gave me some material for the role-playing project I am working on, not that I needed more material for that, but at least this stuff is already typed up.

For those you who have perused the Serial Stories, those are the edited versions of much of the erotica in the Erotica category.  I didn’t edit everything as there are a few stories that for whatever reason didn’t catch on with me.  Now that the semester of HELL is over I can feel the creative writing juices flowing back in which is nice because I haven’t done a lot of creative writing since that semester got underway.  So bare with me while I go through a period of less than in-depth thoughts on sex and more creative, like erotica and fun stuff to do in the bedroom.  I think the switch will be fun.

Other than working on the blog the only other thing I have done today is go for a walk which you can read about over here.  Watch the last four episodes of Robotech with my boy.  Honestly, I’m just not feeling “it” today.  Not sure what “it” is, because if I listen to what is going through my head I have a lot I could do or be doing:

Summer Research Thing

Edit On Volunteering

Edit Stories From Stroud

Work on Blog Class Add New Post instruction Sheet

Edit next Building A Better Blogger blog for Speaking Out on Blogging

Work on next Building A Better Blogger

Work on Pathfinder RPG

Cook Dinner

Work on next Bondage For Beginners

Work on a Kinky Fuckery with Mirrors

Try to find people for the new Naked in Life

Play some more Minecraft

Try to get past that stage on Batman Arkham Asylum that I am stuck on

Go to the store to get milk and ribs

Put away the dishes

Go upstairs and work on kids rooms

See a lot of stuff I could be doing, but honestly I am feeling about this _ inspired.  On the plus side I have decided on what I want to do with the award I have in mind as far as acceptance goes.  Now I need to find an image or two.  Just out of curiosity, how many people are actually, honestly interested in a blogging award for mature-themed bloggers?

Tasty

18 May 2013 10 Comments

by ankoku1331 in Erotica Tags: , , ,

She lay there before his eyes, her skin almost perfectly smooth.  Those areas of her skin that were not perfectly smooth only added to her appeal.  He devoured every inch of her with his eyes.  Inspecting her, not for flaws, but appreciating every part of her that lay before him, like an art collector inspected great works of art for hours on end.  He could see a slight sheen on her skin.  A hint of excitement.  A hint of things to come.

Her aroma that rose to his nose instantly took him back to other pleasurable memories.  Other feasts of flesh that aroused him.  He was taken aback by the intensity of the flood of memories that for a brief moment threatened to overwhelm him in pleasure. The smile on his face became an almost rapturous look as he inhaled deeply taking in her scent.

At his touch she opened up for him.  She was warm to the touch, almost hot in spots.  Juices flowed forth, she was more than ready for him.  Her pink skin glistened alluringly he wanted so much to dive right in.  To bury himself inside her and devour her, but that would ruin the moment.  He brought himself under control, running his fingers over her flesh, relishing in the sensation of her juices on his fingertips against her skin.

Her aroma changed when she opened up for him in intensity and flavor.  More powerful, more delectable. He knew without having tasting her that she was going to be one of the greatest of his life.  He brought his wet fingers to his mouth.  Halting for a moment to deeply inhale the aroma of her off of his fingertips before he put his fingertips to his lips.

His fingertips were moist, warm, and had a flavor on them that was familiar and yet unique to her.  He resisted the urge to jam his fingers into his mouth and suck the juices off like a child with candy on their fingers.  He wanted this moment to last even though he could see more of those tasty juices and more waiting for him. When the flavor was gone from his fingers he savored the remnants of her left on his tongue.  His eyes never left her.

Now was the time, the moment.  He brought her to his mouth.  Her skin was warm on his lips, his tongue darted out to taste her before he brought his mouth around her. His tongue was impatient, he did not blame his tongue one bit.  Smooth to the touch, warm, and juicy.  The juices flowed over his tongue to the back of his throat and over his lips down his chin.  She was perfect.  She was more than ready.

“How is your steak?” the waiter asked.

Crossing i’s and Dotting t’s

17 May 2013 11 Comments

by ankoku1331 in Deep Thought Tags: , ,

I finished updating the Sex Index, which for those not in the know, is a link list to all of the Bondage For Beginners, Kinky Fuckery, Naught Monkey, and other sex blogs that I have written along with a brief description.  If I keep writing about sex I am going to need a second Sex Index. :)

The last blog related item on my “blog to do” list is create an award.  Why would I want to do this?  Because at this moment I can name at least ten non-mature themed blog awards and only two mature-themed blog awards.  I would like to see more and I have an itch to be creative.  I’m thinking the Nude Blogger Award (Naked in Life Blogger Award), which while lame sounding, is better than the Mature-Themed Blogger Award or Recognition of Writing Material That WordPress Does Not Want Seen Award (RWMEWNDWSA).  Names aside what I am thinking about is what “rules” would get the most responses from the majority of bloggers.  One of the things I have noticed is that a lot of the “rules” get tossed out.  I would like to create an award that most people want to get, want to follow the rules, and want to pass along.

With that in mind here are the rules I have so far:

To Accept the Award:

  • Thank the person that AWARDED you, link back to their blog, and post the award image (TBD) in the post or on your blog.

Optional (these are things I am thinking of your input is GREATLY appreciated):

  • Pass the (insert name of award) to a minimum of 1 other blogger and a maximum of 5 other bloggers.
  • Compose a single paragraph of erotica-ish material using the three to four prompts provided by the awarder.
  • Answer no more than five questions.  (Honestly sometimes I find creating and answering more than five questions a chore.  Up to five I am golden every single time)
  • Answer 5 questions that are the same for everyone (not my favorite idea).

Well that is all I have for right now.  If you have any suggestions, comments, or favorites of your own speak up.  I really would like this award to appeal to the most people possible.  Plus how many times do you get to have a hand in creating an award?

It Came Back

17 May 2013 6 Comments

by ankoku1331 in Deep Thought Tags: , ,

Thank you Seattlepolychick for AWARDING me the Resurrected Sensual Blogger Award.  Does that make it an undead award?  Ha…oh that wasn’t that funny…well someone told me to start off with a joke.  Damnit.  I always enjoy getting awards, especially when they have interactive components to them.

Sensual Blogging AwardFor those who are not familiar with the Resurrected Sensual Blogger Award there are rules:

  1. Thank the blogger who nominated AWARDED you with a link back to their blog.
  2. Copy and paste this fine award on your blog.
  3. Answer 7 “sensual” questions posed by the blogger who awarded you this fine award.
  4. Select 7 “sensual” bloggers to award this fine honor.
  5. Create or borrow 7 “sensual” questions for above-mentioned bloggers to answer.

7 to Answer

Here are my answers to Seattlepolychick’s questions:

  1. Have you played with/ Do you like playing with temperature.. icecubes, candlewax, etc? I enjoy playing with cold more than heat mainly because cold is easier to work with; just grab some ice cubes or toss the glass dildo into the freezer for a few minutes.
  2. Name a sexy sexy song. Closer by Nine Inch Nails.
  3. How do you set the stage for your sexy times? Clear off the bed, turn down the lights, get naked, and go. :)
  4. Have you ever read anything realllly titillating?  What?  Name one if you read them all the time. Story of O
  5. Name something you LOVE to do sensually, sexually to someone that really isn’t about you.. that’s about giving pleasure to THEM. Go down on Barb.  Yep go down on Barb.
  6. When you masturbate, assuming you do, do you have a go-to thought or aid?  What? My hand and wrist are in perfect working order so no aids, go to thoughts…depends, but past sexual encounters is pretty common.
  7. Have any sex or sexy time injuries?  scars? I am pretty sure I still have some scars from a really good back scratching (clawing?) I received during sex.

7 to Ask

Here are my seven questions for the seven bloggers below or anyone else that wants to give them or one a go:

  1. You are tasked with creating a sex toy, what is that sex toy (be original)?
  2. One alien that you would have sex with?
  3. Sexual position that you would like renamed and why?
  4. What would you do to improve the impression of sex writers that most people have?
  5. A place that you would have sex in/at if everything worked out?
  6. The one piece of sexual advice that you would like on your tombstone for all to see?
  7. The top five items off of your sexual bucket list?
  8. Bonus Question: I am in the mood for a single paragraph of erotica: can you craft a paragraph with the following prompts: a lusty lass, a broken down van, a hippie with a lisp, and police officer?

7 to Read

You have probably seen these names before, but they are THAT good.  Please, if you do accept the AWARD pass it along to at least one other blogger.

  1. Love, Sex, and Marriage
  2. Temperature’s Rising (yes, I know I awarded you the first time, I want to see what you do with the bonus question :) )
  3. Kdaddy23′s Blog
  4. A Sexual Being
  5. The Perfect Slave
  6. Pretty Primal
  7. Off Go the Panties

Thank you Seattlepolychick for the award.  It comes at a good time, I needed the pick me up.

Building A Better Blogger: Why?

17 May 2013 8 Comments

by ankoku1331 in Building A Better Blogger Tags: , , , , ,

I have written roughly 10 Building A Better Bloggers now and I have a lot more to go, but I seem to have overlooked something important especially when you remember the original purpose of these Building A Better Bloggers was for a class I will be teaching of people who have not blogged before.  What did I overlook?  Why?  Why do they want to blog?

I know that I have been giving this a lot of thought of late.  Why did I start blogging?  Why do I keep blogging?  Why? Why? Why?

Perhaps before I even show them how to set up a blog I should ask them why they want to blog in the first place.  Not what they want to blog about although I am sure that what they want to blog about is related to why they want to blog, but why.

Why did you want to blog?

Why did I?  I guess that is only fair that I answer that question first.

……I like to write.

That isn’t even close.  I could write like I always have in a notebook that nobody, but me reads.  When I finally shuffle off this mortal coil I know that whoever has to go through my stuff will not even crack the cover on any of the notebooks.  They will end up in a pile and that will be that.

…..I am a good writer and I want other people to read what I write.

That is closer to the truth.  I do believe that I am a good writer.  I am not a great writer.  I lack that certain something that propels writers like me into the ranks of fame and fortune.  I do not know what that is beyond the obvious, but that is what editors are for to catch my stupid and lazy mistakes…of course that right there may be why.  Fame and fortune are not what I seek.  If I wanted fame and fortune I would do more with my writing.  I would focus on one aspect and drive that home until I became famous.  I have been paid as a writer, it was not worth my time and I was making good money based on the payscale of the time.

….I want a connection.

That is another step closer to the truth.  When I was writing the weekly ramblings for six years I enjoyed the feedback. The sense of connection with people who read them.  I enjoyed hearing that a person read them and on occasion shared them with people they knew.  I enjoyed finding out that my writing had some sort of meaning to another person.  Blogging is an extension of that.  I enjoy the community.  I enjoy the connection with others.  I enjoy discovering that my writing is enjoyed by others.

…I like the attention.

Even closer.  I am not an attention whore.  That being said I do like to be heard and will make myself be heard.  I enjoy the conversations that start because of what I write or start (the resurrection of mature-themed blog awards), but and I stress this I don’t want a lot of attention.  I like having my privacy.  A good example of what I am talking about, I know that I could promote the shit out of my blog on Reddit, Twitter, and a dozen other places.  I have been aware of this for a while and based on the feedback I have gotten I would do well.  I would do well getting views, but that is not what I am after.  I would rather have twenty regular followers who interact with me than 13,000 views a day from people who only stopped by and never came back.  I forgot that.  When my stats were through the roof I forgot that and I am sorry for that.  I am sorry for that because the numbers became more important, get more numbers, when what I should have focused more on was make deeper connections.  Maybe I did do that, but I know in the back of my head was get more numbers get more attention.  I forgot that I only like so much attention, anything after that bothers me.

..I have something to say.

Almost there.  As much crap as I write, I write a lot of stuff that has a message or information. Even something as simple as what I do with pre-packaged ramen (shut I up even I like pre-packaged ramen) might give someone else out there an idea, thought, or something.  I like to pass on what I know and I can do that with a blog in a way that I cannot do in person, or in a book.

All of the above.

That is why.  Everything above, plus tack on I find writing and thus blogging fun.

No, I don’t expect anyone to write a 800 semi-self-reflective essay on why they want to blog.  I have a lot of time and am self-reflective enough for a classroom, but I think the question is a valid one. Why do you want to blog?

Bondage For Beginners: Pleasure Principle

16 May 2013 13 Comments

by ankoku1331 in Bondage For Beginners Tags: , , , ,

Pleasure Principle 2So you have a person tied down, you realize that you have a lot more time available than normal, and you don’t know what to do.  Let me ask you this question, how well do you know the body of the person you have tied up?  Probably not as well as you think or as you could.  One of the things that most people are not taught is to get to know the body of the person you are with.  How do they react to certain touches.  Where to touch them other than the obvious spots.  How to give pleasure without going straight for the obvious spots.  In other words, to learn how your partner’s body reacts.

Let’s start with some pretty easy things to do that are not obviously sexual in nature, but trust me once you learn how your partner’s body reacts to a variety of stimulations sex will become a lot more fulfilling.

Light Touch

A light touch of fingers sliding across bare skin is one of my favorite sensations to do to a bound person.  Just use the very tips of your fingers one, two, three, or more fingers barely touching the skin.  Don’t move your hands in fingers in predictable directions either, move them around from place to place in a natural, but unpredictable fashion.  Try not to linger in one place either move from back of thigh up to butt up the person’s back and down their sides.  Be careful there is a difference between light touch and tickling (see below).

Do you have long hair?  Drag that long hair over the person’s body.  Whip them lightly with your hair-careful of neck strain and getting hair in the bound person’s mouth or eyes.  Don’t have long hair no worries.  Take a light cloth like a bandana or scarf and lightly drag that over the person’s body.  While you are doing this you should be paying attention to how they react and where they react the most or the least.

Rough (Firm thank you Mrs. Fever) Touch

Use more of the fingers, finger tips or palms when moving your hands across their body.  Apply more pressure. You are not giving a massage, but giving more tactile sensation-more skin contact.  Again pay attention to how the person reacts.  To provide some variety use your finger nails for light scratching.  Mixing the light and rough touches together provides the most sensation, variety, and tends to get the best reactions out of a person.

Pleasure Principle 5Important, do not just focus on the genitals.  The goal is to get to know your partner’s body and the only way to do that is to explore all parts of their body using your hands and senses.  Feet, hands, ears, scalp, stomach, back, and every other part in between.  When they inhale slightly or tense up, remember what you were doing.  You can use that later when you want to get or keep their attention while they are bound.

Massage

Everyone loves a good massage.  Everyone despises a bad massage.  Most people think that they give good massages.  THEY DON’T.  Becoming good at massage is a combination of understanding human anatomy, knowing a combination of light and rough touch, and most of all understanding what the person getting the massage wants and needs.  The best massages, like bondage, take time.  Not five minutes, but half-hour to an hour of time spent working on the person’s entire body.  A goal of a massage, especially with someone who is bound, is to get them relaxed, to get them in a good mental space, to relive or prevent any aches from being bound.  This is not achieved by roughly crushing, pinching, or whatever most people call a massage to the neck or shoulders for three to five minutes.  This is achieved through time, the application of a variety of techniques, none of which I am qualified to write about.  Thankfully there are many good books on massage.  When you can give a good massage you will get great sex in return or a good massage in return.

Tickling

Personally I am not a fan of tickling during bondage, but tickling happens. More than tickling happens is that you know whether the person likes to be tickled and where they are ticklish and what tickles them.  Thus I suggest that you ask first, before any bondage and then while you are learning your partner’s body using any of the above you pay attention to any new or unknown tickle spots.  How you use them is up to you.

Pleasure Principle 3Ice

Finally some fun.  Ice cubes are a fun way to explore a person’s body.  Watching their skin react, watching how their body reacts to both the ice and the cold water that comes off the melting cube is always interesting.

In conclusion, remember a goal of everyone should be to learn how their partner’s body reacts to a variety of stimulation.  During bondage when a person has nothing to do but stay in one place being able to provide a variety of stimulation to a variety of locations on their body is the best way to keep their attention where you want it to be.

For further reading see:

Bondage for Beginners

Bondage for Beginning Beginners

Bondage for Beginning Beginners II

Bondage for Beginners Cuff Special

Bondage for Beginners: Cuff Special Now with Photos

Bondage for Amateur Novices (Part 1)

Bondage for Amateur Novices (Part 2)

Bondage for Amateur Novices (Part 3)

Bondage for…Well I’m Not Sure Yet

Bondage for Beginners, What To Do Overview

Bondage for Beginners: Control Checklist

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