What is Kinky Fuckery?

“Sex with a twist.” -J.

Kinky Fuckery for those who do not know is from 50 Shades of Grey; the characters use it with each other.   In the book it refers to the supposed “kinky” lifestyle that the main character has, but in my opinion is sorely under utilized.  Seriously, why have what reads like the ultimate bondage room and use it less than ten times in a book where you are known for your “kinkiness?”  I couldn’t tell you, we have a small wall of bondage stuff and it gets used frequently.

For people looking to get me a gift, but don’t know me that well or think I have everything (I don’t, still missing a GIMP) anything that glows-in-the-dark is always welcome.  I used to collect anything and everything that glowed-in-the-dark, I even had a glow-in-the-dark jellyfish.  Why?  Because it glowed-in-the-dark.  Back when I was seriously collecting there wasn’t much in the glow-in-the-dark sex toy area.  Sad me.

Today things are much different.  I can get a glow-in-the-dark pocket pussy, for when I am rehabbing my wrist in the dark.  I can get a glow-in-the-dark clone-a-willy for that radioactive look that I have always wanted my junk to have.  Plus when the survivors of the apocalypse find it they will think that it is magical because it glows-in-the-dark and my cock will light their darkest hours.  I can get a multitude of glow-in-the-dark vibrators and dildos so that I can find Barb in the dark…well I can find a part or two of Barb’s in the dark. I can get a shit ton of glow-in-the-dark sex dice just in case I wanted to go blind playing a sex game in the dark; ever try to read those damn dice in the dark?  Tiny fucking writing.  If I am in the dark with a naked you, the last thing that had better be happening is dice rolling and reading.  I can even get a glow-in-the-dark rabbit.  No, not for sex.  See the jellyfish for why.

One area that has been lacking in glow-in-the-dark material is bondage gear.  Black leather and silver studs are the norm.  That’s great if you are going for that “look”…you know vintage bondage or Marquis DeSade feel.  Personally, after many years of the “look” I am bored with it.  A woman in bondage of my devising is hot enough without having to have her decked out in black leather and silver studs.  Now a woman in bondage that glows-in-the-dark would turn my crank if I was about to die.  That is HOT SHIT to me.  Unfortunately what is a lad to do?  You can’t find glow-in-the-dark bondage gear…or can you?

YES, YOU CAN!

Let me say that again, YES, YOU CAN!

Barb surprised me with the find of a lifetime.  Well my lifetime.  She found glow-in-the-dark Firefly Duct Tape.  As you may know she has been making all sorts of things out of Duck (Duct) Tape and posting them on Tied Up in Tape.  Mostly bondage gear, but the occasional life accessory.  Now, she is working on a glow-in-the-dark bondage set (s).  One for us and other sets for those most awesome glow-in-the-dark enthusiasts or glow-in-the-dark bondage enthusiasts or for those who like stuff that lights up under black lights.  As a side note, did you know that black light enthusiasts and glow-in-the-dark enthusiasts are similar?  Bet you didn’t.  Now you do.

Cuffs, collar, straps and maybe even a thigh strap or two that all glow-in-the-dark.  Now, start imagining all of the fun you and yours can have with the lights out.

For further reading see:

Kinky Fuckery

Kinky Fuckery III

Kinky Fuckery IV

Kinky Fuckery V